What is self-care?

Anna Ukalska

PSYCHOLOGIST, PSYCHOTHERAPIST, HR ADVISOR, CAREER CONSULTANT, RECRUITER, TRAINER

Disclaimer: self-care on a daily basis and during a crisis

It may seem to you that self-care in the current situation in Europe is selfishness. Nothing could be further from the truth – it is relevant especially now. It’s not just about putting on a mask or eating something good – although that may be part of what self-care consists of. Here we are talking about taking care of one’s well-being, and this is even more important in a crisis. We invite you to read more.

Concept self-care is rather self-evident and fairly well known to everyone familiar, given its still growing in popularity. Today we hear more and more about wellbeing, wellbeing and the trend of taking care of ourselves. But do we all understand this concept correctly?

On the one hand, it can be distorted and understood as pure selfishness, being interested only in oneself and one’s own well-being, without regard to circumstances, context and other people. The opposite extreme is putting the needs and comfort of others first, at a huge cost to one’s own needs and health. Of course, both perspectives are damaging. It turns out that the line is, as always, extremely thin and difficult to draw. However, it should be staked, because this is the only way to find true psychological well-being.

So what is healthy self care?

Some define these terms as maintaining a healthy friendship with oneself, being good to yourself. It’s taking equal care of all areas of one’s
self, thus about the body, psyche and soul. Such comprehensive care in a sustainable way makes it possible to ensure well-being, broadly defined health and the desired comfort of life. It is, in a sense, a lifestyle that defines us and communicates to others my approach to myself and the world, our value system, needs and expectations of others.

Healthy self-care has many elements to take care of our well-being. Below you will find 11 ways to
self-care, on a daily basis and in difficult times:

Physical activity – it’s hard to be in a good mood when you don’t feel good about your body, which may be stiff, sore or sluggish from lack of movement. Studies have shown that regular exercise increases the levels of serotonin in our bodies – a hormone responsible for, among other things, feelings of happiness. They also help relieve emotions and tension.
A good night’s sleep – Optimally 8 hours a day is invaluable for recovery from the day’s exertions.
Tailored and balanced diet and regular meals. More and more we hear the phrase: you are what you feed on. Figuratively with what you read, what you watch, what you listen to, but also literally with what you eat. The more our diet is healthy, wholesome, free of unhealthy additives, varied and tailored to our lifestyle, the better our body functions. Poor nutrition not only contributes to the intensification of disease symptoms, but can also be a major cause or increase the risk of the onset of many somatic diseases. From there, it’s often a short road to mental health disorders. There is also increasing talk of conscious eating. As Marek Zaremba writes in his bestselling book Lamb detox: “We live too fast and rapidly. We are in a hurry, constantly lacking time for a restful sleep and a meal. We reward ourselves with food for the hardships of everyday life. We consume tons of processed food in a hurry. We forget that the primary source of healing is reflection on who we are and where we are going.”
Rest – time for yourself, to regenerate as you like and as it serves you, a mental detox, space to breathe during and after a busy day.
Balance in the daily activities undertaken, without focusing only on grueling physical workouts or exploiting oneself exclusively professionally or in only one role – that of employee, partner or parent.
Balance and satisfaction in all important spheres of life – family, professional, financial, personal development, passions, health and physical and mental fitness or spirituality. Balance means being attentive to each of these spheres without unhealthy investment in only some of them at the expense of others. Of course, it’s hard to take care of everyone when there’s still a pandemic going on, the economic crisis is worsening, and there’s a vicious war abroad. Don’t do anything by force, listen to your needs.
Psychological and social competencies related to functioning in interpersonal relationships, expressing emotions, needs or communication. Proper, healthy interpersonal communication, although it has been the subject of hundreds of trainings, courses and webinars for many years, is still proving to be the foundation and unfortunately the number one unmet need. Listening, using “I” messages, expressing emotions, assertively speaking our needs, opinions and views – these are the skills that ensure our healthy functioning in social relationships, families and professional groups.
Awareness of one’s own rights and bold, assertive enforcement of them. You have the right to know, to rest, to have a different opinion, to be free, to speak freely, to have personal integrity, to change your mind, to be tired*, to say no. You have the right to assert your rights and expect others to respect that. Remember that this does not mean that you can harm the other person in the process.
Work on self-esteem, self-acceptance – Being aware of who I am – a valuable, unique person – is proving to be insanely important in adult functioning. Most often we carry it out of the home, but usually when that doesn’t happen, we have to work to rebuild it as adults. It is the basis in relationships with others, functioning in relationships, family, at work.
Good organization and planning of work – That is, the ability to manage one’s time and daily tasks. How much it can make our daily work easier and save us in a heap of duties!
Specialized assistance – That is, psychological support, psychotherapy, coaching and support groups. It may be that we are unable to help ourselves on our own, and our attempts to take care of ourselves and work on ourselves are not fully effective. It’s always a good idea to ask for help then. You have the right to need and get help when you need it. Perhaps the prescription will be psychological support, maybe coaching, maybe psychotherapy. Don’t be afraid to embark on this path. This can be a truly healing and restorative process that will take you out into new uncharted and undiscovered waters.