Why are men reluctant to take care of their mental health and how to encourage them to do so?

Who are we talking about in this article: cis men, that is, those whose gender identity is the same as the sex assigned at birth. They are the ones affected by these studies and statistics.

What is toxic masculinity?

Toxic masculinity can be defined as, put simply simply , harmful beliefs about how boys and men should behave. These are often concepts imposed by culture and society, seen as “traditional” masculinity. Compliance is rewarded in today’s patriarchal society, while attempts to practice healthy masculinity are often met with lack of understanding and ostracism. This is slowly changing, but toxic masculinity is still, one of the (dysfunctional) foundations of cultures and societies around the world.

The key role here is the way upbringing of boys – are to be strong, not cry. They are taught from birth that crying, certain emotions and traits are unmanly, and at the same time – aggression is masculine, as is not respecting the other person’s boundaries. Beating up classmates instead of talking to them or “horse courting” instead of showing attention in a safe and healthy way – while these behaviors may seem innocent and childish, they teach boys dysfunctional behaviors and beliefs that harm them and the rest of society in adulthood. 

Typical features of toxic masculinity :

• Physical strength
• Domination
• Lack of emotion
• Independence
• Potency

Toxic masculinity and men’s mental health

This traditional masculinity is terribly damaging . It is she who reinforces rape culture and contributes to the suffering of many people. And while it might seem that men are in a privileged position here, their mental condition also suffers significantly. Men who identify with the values of traditional (i.e., toxic) masculinity are more likely to suffer from mental health problems and, at the same time, are less likely to seek help. This lonely suffering in silence often ends tragically – men even commit suicide Seven times more often than women.

According to research, the most damaging traits are those associated with sexism and extreme self-reliance in solving problems. The result is difficulty in establishing healthy, supportive relationships, especially with women – a mother, sister, partner or work colleague. Moreover, sexism is often no longer tolerated and can mean exclusion from a group that does not want to deal with sexism or misogyny. Such men are therefore often lonely , they feel misunderstood and anger, which they can vent in dangerous ways – on themselves or others.

Mental and emotional problems are seen as a sign of weakness. Asking for help can involve shame and guilt. The stigmatization of mental health present in our society does not help.

To reduce emotional pain, men often turn to unhealthy ways of coping – alcohol, drugs or violence.

How do you recognize that an employee may need help?

So since men are unlikely to share their problems, what symptoms should draw our special attention? Your employee may need support , if:

• Has frequent mood swings
• Is visibly tired, complains of sleep problems
• He is less productive and motivated
• Has trouble concentrating
• Apparently lost or gained weight
• He withdrew from social life 

However, it is worth noting that men may have different symptoms from those seen as a sign of mental deterioration. This is related precisely to the internalization of traditional masculinity and attitudes toward mental health. They can hide their feelings and emotional pain by being irritable, angry or even aggressive.

How can you help your employees?

The fight against toxic masculinity and its harmful mental health consequences requires a global revolution and cannot be achieved alone. Instead, you can take care of the men in your care. So how can you help your employees?

Above all, fight the stigma

Show that asking for help is not a sign of weakness, is not unmanly. It is human, necessary and natural. Sensitivity and showing vulnerability is a great strength and often requires great courage. It is precisely because we are taught – all of us, but especially men – to be as independent as possible and to deal with problems on our own that this is so hard to believe.

Educate about mental health

Teach Workers that mental health has each of us and should be taken care of, just as we take care of physical health. It is also worth making them aware that mental deterioration may be due to an illness or disorder that requires medical care and appropriate treatment. Depression, for example, can result from a chemical imbalance in the brain. Perhaps such a “clinical” perspective will help break down the thinking that it’s a matter of emotion and weakness.

What’s more, it’s worth making employees aware that neglected or even ignored mental problems take the form of physical ones – migraines, body aches, stomach problems or lowered immunity. This includes real changes in the brain. Especially if alcohol and/or drugs are involved, which, although they are slowly destroying us, can serve as (harmful) self-help.

Promote mental health care

Encourage holistic care of your mental condition – educate yourself, talk, seek professional support.

Also promote physical activity, which is important in taking care of our overall health. You can, for example, introduce rewards for getting to work by bicycle, public transportation or on foot. Healthy eating is also important. Diet and exercise have a huge The importance of For the mental condition.

Point out that time spent on taking care of your mental health is not wasted, in fact it is advisable.

Father and son

Providing knowledge, materials and coaching on how to to raise a boy healthily employees who have sons can ensure that we not only take care of the future generation, but also We can help fathers in healthy processing and expression of emotions, showing tenderness and love, and other “unmanly” things.

Help understand male anger

Teach, where anger comes from and what is its role. Anger does not always have to be something negative and destructive – it is a normal, healthy emotion. You can let it just be, without expressing it, or you can externalize it in a healthy and even therapeutic way. This is especially relevant for men, who have been taught to mask pain and other “difficult” emotions precisely with anger and aggression.

Enter benefit psychological support

Make sure that employees thoroughly know , where and how to take advantage of the benefit. Encourage them to give it a try – one “trial” visit may sound more inviting than the word “therapy,” which connotes treatment, talking about feelings and mental problems.

Also assure employees of total privacy and anonymity.

Support healthy initiatives

Consider The company’s involvement in campaigns to promote physical and mental health. An example of such an action is Movember, Which focuses on men’s health. In this way, you show that the company cares about the well-being of its employees and does not stigmatize mental health. 

Ask and talk

Check in with how your employees are feeling – this could be an informal chat after a meeting or over coffee. However, also consider more formal options that will allow you to keep track of the situation, Sending periodic anonymous surveys or regular 1-on-1 meetings will make it possible to implement appropriate solutions and help the employee before his condition deteriorates further.

Be an example

Men are reluctant to ask for help, but do so more readily if another man they respect shares his problems, mental condition and experiences with therapy. Show your employees that expressing emotions and crying have no gender – they are simply human and natural.